I’ve posted a blog a while back about hating because I’ve always practiced loving and caring and my household has always have this atmosphere of all consuming love that its soo hard to ignore. Well, its just that for people who haven’t experienced that kind of atmosphere in their household I wouldn’t exactly blame them for hating. Because they never get to know what its like to be loved and have love in their families, they turn to hate instead.
However, I have had love. I have love. But right now, Im’a hatinnnn..
Im never the one who hates because I know that nothing good is gonna come out of it. You hate, you gain nothing.You hate, your heart’s black. You hate, you’ll never learn to love. You just wrack your heart with loads of hatred that you don’t even know if it’ll do you good.
Ironically, I didn’t know it feels good to hate too. The feeling is so liberating. its like eating ice cream on a verry hot Wednesday at 10am. Satisfying.
I’ve been hating someone just now and God, its so fulfilling to just scream out loud that I don’t likkkke the person and the chances of me ever liking that person again is NIL. I feel great when I ranted out to my friend Barbie that if only there’s no way that our paths will ever cross again with ME smiling at the loser. I told her that i’m not coming back to CDO just because of that and she’s like, “Why are you the one avoiding?” and I’m all, “Because i dont wanna ruin my day.” hahah. Its just exhilirating to just let it out off your chest like that (especially when its a chest like mine) and just dont care about principles and how people are gonna think. Whoever said there are principles behind hating anyway? You don’t say I’m sorry for hating someone. There’s no rule for hating a person either.
Oh, finally, I’m hating, i’m hating, i’m hating, i’m hating. Its a giddy feeling. My mom told me to not mind the people that are hurting me because they are ugly and because she’s pretty and I am her daughter therefore, I am beautiful and not pay attention to losers and suyaerns and people who don’t know what else to do in their lives but play around with their feelings and claim that its love when all these times they are just trying to look for something else to fill that void inside them and cling on to another person hoping that they can suck the life out of them because they are empty to begin with and they depend on other people to make them happy since they don’t know how to do that in the first place. It sucks that the people whom you used to be good friends with and even shared a lifetime with suddenly turned their backs on you and started talking bad about you and even start picking at the things that they know would really strike a nerve and worse, *gulp* hurt you and not consider that I was just here in Cebu mindful of my business trying in every way to love people unconditionally without expecting anything because the last time i loved it wasn’t enough which is why im making it all up right now to the people who i am with in cebu and i couldn’t say more for the past because there was just too much dark chocolate there (i.e. bittersweet) and right now those people knew that they’ve somehow held me on that spot and must have been very smug about hurting me and oh, that is just so wrong but there isn’t any way that people can tell other people what to do so which is right now im hating and im feeling good about it .If my favorite English teacher were reading the previous sentences right now, she’d collaspe.
Hahaha. Run-on. Running on. Ran on. Like my friend rona said, this is a blog therefore keep those grammar corrections to yourself. (Hahah, madz, I’m qouting you na, that makes you a public figure)
my friends knew who are the people i am talking about and i love them so much for understanding and being tolerant but if they join in the hate parade woohoo. the more the merrier. hahaha. seriously, i wanna rant what a loser a person could be and how low could they sink you know. that is probably the worst self-defense anyone could ever come up. If flinging insults and all forms of ridicule at me could make you feel better, I WILL NOT INDULGE YOU. They’re not even constructive — they’re pathetic. Although insults, bad as they are, don’t ever mean a thing to me because i am one huge kapal-moks person in this city who doesnt care what people think, who goes up to people to ask for their phone numbers, who flashes her g-string in public, who picks a fight with people who have hurt my friends, who asks for extra services in restaurants, and who is the most confident person in the world who thinks she is prettier than KC Concepcion who happens to be her idol. However, if that insult came from someone’s mouth who you least likely expect to say it and who happens to do mean a lot to me and who used to tell me I am the best thing that happened to the person then i hate, i hated, i am hating, i will hate, i will be hating, and i am going to hate them. Best conjugation ever in the English language.
my mom hates them too. haha. this is not clenching the fist, eyes turning red, i-will-kill-you-if-i-see-you kind of hate.. this is a smiling, heart-tugging, its-so-great-to-hate-you kind of hate.
toodsie. i hope i never get to see you because i don’t know what i’m capable of doing when i do. i cant stand the sight of you. i can’t stand the smell of you. i can’t stand your voice. I can’t stand your person. if it weren’t for the people who loves you who i also love greatly, i’d be all over you right now.
So you want insults? OH, no… don’t let ME start.
….yeah, yeah who am i kidding? if i hate, i would just be like the person then. who cares. *