I dated one medrep back in 2006 in the history of my single life. This was different. After agreeing to meet him offline, (yep that blasted app) I thought he was a scuba driver who looked good in a wet suit. Until he called.
The voice was something else. It was like Alvin the Chipmunk being squashed with ten pounds of flour. Or Master Yoda pretending to be a girl. Can you imagine how it would sound like in bed?
Feeling close to bailing out, I had no choice but to climb into his VIOS and grit my teeth when Christmas songs started playing in the car.
“Coffee?” He asked. Or more like strained to ask.
So he pulled over at Dunkin freaking Donuts. Nothing against Dunkin Donuts – I love their P25 brewed coffee. But at 10pm when Starbucks or Coffeebean or anything else but Dunkin was open, I don’t understand the preference for the last go-to coffee place at this time.
Of course, students with their thick books all spread out at every table there is made us choose a cramped spot near the restroom. I’m giving him 10-minutes to redeem himself after this unless he tells me to sit on his face after 5.
“I’m on this app because I wanted to meet new friends.”
Felt coffee scalding my tongue.
“I’m really manyakis. But I don’t want to come off presko.”
Now I wanna scald my throat.
“Look, its getting late.” I started to down that hot coffee to end this night right away. ‘Nieta that was hot.
He stretched his arms. “It is. Would be nice to get a massage tonight.”
Oh, no. Not the massage bait on me. I looked at his wrinkly and haggardo-Versoza face.
“I’m sure there is still something open tonight. Shall we?”